TELEVISION = CRAPPY VISION : Crappy Ads

Sometimes life is great. But still most of the time, it sucks. And there's really nothing you can do about it. But still, there are stuffs that just might change it, if you really have the time for it.

Have you ever imagine what if would feel like to actually come back to your own home after work and switch on your television set, constantly changing channels to find one that might actually helps you in soothing your mind after that LONG meeting and then within the next five minutes finding yourself hitting the On/Off button and decided to go and take a warm bath instead?

That would certainly sucks. And that is the horrid truth of what television programs in Malaysia might be. BUT gladly, not all of them. And truth be told, the only crappy show that I think that are not supposed to be aired are the ads.

Ads are meant to actually tell viewers (or readers) that somewhere out there, there is this product that can somehow helps you with whatsoever problem that you might have. BUT (there's always the but) ads nowadays are craps. Or even worst.

This ad for example : 

Note : OH MY GOD there's no sample of this ad in YouTube! Not that I want to put one. If I did that then maybe I'll be making my way to the jail for this. Hrmm, media nowadays.

1) Finger plunging ad.

So the ad goes somewhat like this. There this one Chinese guy who is talking in a very bad English, or rather in a Chinglish. And he kept saying that 'I loves HOLES' which to me sounded pretty much like some sex offender. And throughout the ad he kept thrusting his fingers (what did you think? His 'weapon'? Jeez grow up a little will ya?) into random holes, exclusive of bodily holes (i.e nostrils, ear canals, mouth, skin pore, vagina, or ass hole). And the holes that he did fitted in his finger includes someone's earing, flute, bottle, hair curler, bowling ball, and also a potato chip (the name of the potato chip is kept secret of self benefit).

My opinion : The fact that he love holes is pretty bad enough for me. And since it's a he, it sent off my gaydar on. And it's bad. The ad is  even very confusing. Why bothered with others' holes? I mean, you yourself have holes so why don't you use it? Nostrils for example, I'm sure you can dig for some 'golds' in it. And bowling ball? Everyone who loves bowling had to love the holes. I mean, there's no use in just love to play bowling but hating puting your fingers into the holes that are meant for fingers. And hair curlers? God this man is creepy. 

2) Einstien Jr.

A mom was explaining to her daughter around the age 5 that polar bears lives in the north pole and that they eat fishes, and some vegetables and fruits. Then her daughter asked her mom whether polar bears eat penguins or not. Her mom then in a smirk asked her daughter back 'What do you think?' And after some gulps of her super-awesome-wonderful-yummy-delicious-brain stimulating drink, she went out and grabbed a globe an boldly stated that 'This is the Earth(?). Polar bears live in the north pole while penguins lives in the south pole. Therefore polar bears have never eaten penguins!'. Such a brilliant kid.

My opinion : That kid is way to brilliant for me. And it reminded me of some stories a few years back where there this group of brilliant babies trained by some secret force to create a super evil baby geniuses, which I don't remember the title of the film. Back to the point, I'll show you why this ad is crappy. 

a) The daughter had just asked her mother about the polar bears and the penguins. This make sense since she's a little girl,and a little girl NORMALLY don't know much about how the world works. 

b) Her mother asked her back about her opinion. Why would you asked your daughter a question she had just asked you? I mean what if she asked you where she came from? Are you going to asked her back? Is that normal? 

c) Her daughter drank her amazing drink. Well, that is a way of not answering question that you don't know the answer. 

d) She gladly explained to her mother the whole truth about the world. OH MY GOD that kid sure is some freaking genius! 

3) Mine is bigger than yours.

This next ad is actually an ad for an outdoor programme lauched by a television station here. The whole ad is crappy creepy. At first, there is this hunk guy who had the programme name in this board, which he proudly showed to the camera. Then suddenly came this guy with a bigger board of the same design, holding it in a very sexy and erotic way, placing it near his crotch area. Or maybe its a little above that area I don't care. It's creepy.

My opinion : One word. GAY.

And these are some of the few ads that really gets into my nerve for some very unrealistic reason. I just hate them. And it sucks. And they deserve better ads than this. And I really do believe that they are capable of making awesome ads that these crappy ads. Heh.

Heads up, I might do a similiar version of thi post for tv programmes. Just wait for it!

Note : I won't be using labels anymore, because labels are hard to define and it sucks and no labels means no stress means YAAAAYY!!